In dense darkness I wandered
lost in the mistake
The vain path of pleasure
He took me to death
Being rebellious to Your voice
you wanted to love me like this
If it hadn’t been for your love
I would still run from you
With this somber first verse begins this modern anthem, which incidentally has become a favorite for many since its release in 2008 in English and in 2012 in . The song is titled “My Life Is Christ,” written by Jordan Kauflin, a pastor at Redeemer Church in Arlington, Virginia; and with musical arrangements made by his father, Bob Kauflin, director of Sovereign Grace Music, and pastor at Sovereign Grace Church in Louisville, Kentucky.
I recently asked Jordan and Bob a few questions about the lyrics of this classic of our time.
Jordan, what initially inspired you to write “My Life Is Christ” and what was the process of writing it?
Jordan: As often happens with me, the final product was not what I had originally set out to write. My brother Devon and I were working on songs for the album “Looked Upon,” which was produced by Sovereign Grace in 2008. At that time, I felt inspired to write a song that talked about the joy we have in Jesus, which is greater than any pleasure that this world can offer us. That led me to try to describe the foolishness of living our life without Jesus: “In thick darkness I wandered.”
I was also influenced by the last two lines of John Newton’s hymn, “Old Things Passed Away”; specifically, to think that if God had not first loved us, we would still be refusing his mercy.
Once I had established the words for the chorus, I began the laborious process of composing each line in a way that would tell the story of redemption and our response to it. My father was a great help in shaping the song. I would work on the lyrics for a couple of weeks, then play them, and often hear from his lips: “Sounds good, but I think it could sound better!”
The first verse of the song came out quickly. Which of the verses turned out to be more difficult?
Jordan: Two come to mind: First, deciding on the structure of the chorus. I remember writing numerous ideas, all of them meritorious, such as:
Hallelujah! My life is you, Jesus
You called my desperate soul to grace
Hallelujah! My life is you, Jesus
Now you firmly hold me
My father kept challenging me to make it simpler and simpler.
Finally, partly because I resigned myself, I thought: “What if I just said it like that?”
Hallelujah! my life is Christ
Hallelujah! Jesus is my every thing
Sometimes simplicity is better.
The third and fourth verses of the third verse were a challenge as well. I wanted to communicate something about the complete dependence we have on Jesus, even as we respond obediently to Him, but I couldn’t get the idea. My father then suggested the concept that people should see that
I will follow your commandments
By Your power in me
That communicated exactly what I wanted to say.
Bob: Looking back on the original verses, I am very grateful that Jordan considered the chorus, and worked as he did to reduce it. It was worth the investment to now be able to sing with joy: “Hallelujah! My life is Christ! Hallelujah! Jesus is my every thing!”, And know that that’s all we need to say.
Part of the original lyrics
The track was finished, and with it closed “Looked Upon,” the album that the band New Attitude (New Attitude) released at the conference in 2008. Was “My Life Is Christ” played live for the first time at that conference in Louisville?
Bob: Yes, the first time we sang outside the context of the local church was in Nueva Atitud 2008. Until then, it had only been played in our church.
So the song started spreading from church to church pretty quickly. While that was happening, what was the immediate response?
Jordan: When I finally got through the songwriting process, I thought I had written an acceptable song. Nothing special. Decent. But people began to express how deeply that song had ministered to them as they sang it, how special the song put words to the stories of their lives, and how it had become one of their favorite songs. I was genuinely surprised.
I distinctly remember sitting in one of the New Attitude conference sessions, listening to Pastor John Piper speak, and when he began his message, he began by quoting the words from the refrain. As he proceeded to explain the true meaning of them, I remember thinking, “Wow, That’s really deep!” I am glad that the Lord, in His wisdom, gave me words to write, even though I had not understood the deep meaning of them.
Bob: When the song was finished, I thought that this was exactly the kind of praise that I wanted to sing and for others to sing. Each verse progressively leads us to the inevitable conclusion that our lives are nothing without Christ and His gospel. I suspected it wouldn’t be long before churches around the world were singing it.
Bob, from your perspective, what has been the effect of this song?
Bob: Just as I expected, the song has quickly become one of the best-known praise songs Sovereign Grace has ever produced. On our website, we have versions of it in various languages such as Croatian, Chinese, German, Japanese, Korean, Russian and Spanish, and we will probably have more in the near future.
I have lost count of the number of people who have told me that the song perfectly describes how God has worked in their lives. And it is natural, because it tells the story of every Christian.
Yeah, I feel like it has a feel like Amazing Gracefor its simplicity and for its way of encapsulating certain universal experiences of the Christian life. Jordan, as you look at the many ways God has used this piece of music around the world, what have you learned about God using your efforts for His glory?
Jordan: On numerous occasions, I have received emails from people wanting to know about the inspiration and story behind the song. I usually tell them that this is just another example of how God uses our simple work for His glory. There wasn’t a moment of great inspiration, nor did it flow from some incredible story from someone’s life (although, redemption is pretty incredible!). I didn’t set out to write a song for thousands of people to sing it. I just wanted to be disciplined to finish a song, and frankly I had to work really hard to get it done.
I still don’t know why God has chosen this to bless so many people. But I am grateful. I am grateful because it constantly reminds me of the beauty, the freedom, and the joy of living in the kingdom of God. Our deeds and what we accomplish do not define us. But in His goodness, He uses our effort.
Bless one person or a million, the same truth remains. Our glory is He. The more I live in that truth, the more I can sing with joy and faith: Hallelujah! My life is Christ!
There is truly something powerful that every composer who has been called upon to create hymns, poems, articles, sermons, and books can take away: God uses the time we invest and the sweat of our revisions for His own glory. The mental work to come up with making points clear and simple is often long and hard; but in the end, the fruit can become succulent and sweet.
A special thanks to Bob and Jordan Kauflin, the father/son duo behind the “My Life Is Christ” song.
Originally posted for . Translated by Andreina Lopez.