Heb 13:4 honorable be in all the me, and the bed
Formalize and sanctify the union of man and woman for the procreation of children. The most common term in Heb. it is laqah, to take in marriage. It must be considered together with the verb ba†™al, to own, rule, or possess in marriage as well as with the noun ba†™al, owner, lord, husband.
The father was in charge of finding a suitable bride for his son. The wishes or feelings of the young people were mostly irrelevant in the decision. Isaac’s marriage was arranged between his father’s servant and his future wife’s brother. She was consulted last (Gen 24:33-53, Gen 24:57, 58), though perhaps only because her father had already died. Rarely was parental advice ignored, refused, or unsolicited (Gen 26:34-35), and, on a very rare occasion, Michal, Saul’s daughter, expressed her love for David (1Sa 18: 30).
Marriage to a foreigner was generally discouraged, although some Hebrews took wives from among women captured in war.
Samson’s parents gave him permission to marry a Philistine woman (Jdg 14:2-3). The fear was always expressed that marriage to a non-Israelite would weaken covenant faith due to the presence of ideas and practices related to other gods (1Ki 11:4).
Because marriages between close relatives were common, there were consanguinity limits that the Israelites had to follow (Lev 18:6-18).
Anciently, a man could marry his half-sister on his father’s side (Gen 20:12; compare 2Sa 13:13), although it was prohibited in Lev 20:17. Cousins, such as Isaac with Rebekah and also Jacob with Rachel and Leah, frequently married, although a simultaneous marriage with two sisters was specifically prohibited (Lev 18:18). The union of aunt and nephew produced Moses (Exo 6:20; Num 26:59), although a marriage between such relatives was later prohibited by the law of Moses.
Jacob, already married to the two sisters, Rachel and Leah, received their female servants as wives (Gen 30:3-9), while his brother Esau had three wives (Gen 26:34; Gen 28:9; Gen 36:1-5). Gideon is said to have had many wives (Jdg 8: 30-31) and Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1Ki 11: 1-3).
Despite these examples of polygamy, the most common and acceptable form of marriage was monogamy, which received the sanction of the Law of Moses (compare Exo 20:17; Exo 21:5; Deu 5:21, et al. ). Jesus’ teaching on marriage emphasized the fact that it is a commitment for life and, although he recognized that Moses had regulated the practice of divorce that already existed in his time before your hardness of heart (Mar 10:4-5), he taught traditional Hebrew monogamy and added that the marriage of a divorced person while the spouse was still alive constituted adultery (Mark 10:11-12).
Levirate marriage helped maintain and protect the family name and property. When a man died without leaving a child, it was the responsibility of the closest male relative, usually the brother, to marry the widow. The first male born of this union would be considered the son of the deceased and would correspond by law to his name and all his rights to his property. Even if the widow already had children, her male relative was still expected to marry her and support her.
Before marriage, a woman was a member of her father’s family and, as such, subject to his authority. By marrying, her husband became her protector, and when he died, through her levirate marriage she found her new redeemer. Like many other Hebrew traditions, levirate marriage was also known to the Canaanites, Assyrians, and Hittites. The best-known levirate marriage in the OT is that of Ruth the Moabite, who married Boaz after her closest relative refused to take responsibility (Deu 25:5-10; Rth 4:1-12).
The practice of marrying (Deu 28:30; 2Sa 3:14) involved a certain legal status that made it almost identical to marriage. The law required that a man who committed adultery with a virgin betrothed to another should be stoned for raping his neighbor’s wife (Deu 22:23-24). It was normal for a couple to be married for a year, and this year counted as part of the permanent marriage relationship (Mat 1:18; Luk 1:27; Luk 2:5). During the first year of their marriage the groom was exempt from military service (Deu 24:5) so that the marriage was established on a solid foundation. The father of the bride referred to his son-in-law as such from the moment the couple was married (Gen 19:14), a custom that strengthened the concept of family solidarity. In the period before Christianity, divorce was an option always available to the husband and sometimes also to the wife.
After the return from captivity, wholesale divorce was demanded of all Hebrews who had married foreign women to prevent the influence of idolatry on God’s people. However, under normal circumstances, there was a tendency in Jewish tradition to discourage Israelites from divorcing. Following Egyptian custom, a heavy fine of divorce money was required as a deterrent. The wife’s status was not very high, however; a divorce certificate could take the form of a very simple rejection of the husband with an expression such as: She is no longer my wife, nor am I her husband (Hos 2: 2). In the early Christian period, divorce could be considered only when there was a mixed marriage between a believer and a pagan and, even in this case, the believer was not allowed to remarry while the spouse was alive. The early church was criticized for being too lenient when it started letting widows remarry.
Source: Hispanic World Bible Dictionary
Israelite marriage customs shared many of the common customs of other Near Eastern peoples. The father, as head of the family, normally selected a bride for his son and arranged for the marriage (see Gen. 24:4). The girl’s role was passive, as she was given as wife to the man her father chose. Romantic love was not necessarily absent, and a caring father would consider his daughter’s wishes. It is said, for example, that Michal loved David (1 Sam. 18:20).
The concept of *Levirate marriage can be seen reflected in the ancient custom in which a bride was bought by the father of the son for him. In the event of the son’s death, the widow was given to the next son. The biblical word mohar was used for the gift given to the father (or brothers
Source: Archaeological Biblical Dictionary
It is the †¢pact between a man and a woman to live together. Through this pact, with the blessing of God, they pleasantly unite their bodies and souls to mutually express their love, reproduce the human species and constitute society beginning with the family.
The married state is used in different biblical passages to illustrate the relationship of God with his people (“And I will betroth you to me forever…† ; “…as a husband rejoices with his wife, so your God will rejoice with you† ) . In the book of the prophet Hosea, his m. with † ¢ Gomer and her subsequent infidelity serves to briefly explain the history of Israel, whom God took as one who takes a wife, to later receive his disloyalty († ¢ Hosea, Book of).
the NT, also resorts to the figure of m. to mark Christ’s relation to his church († œ… for I have betrothed you to one husband, to present you as a pure virgin to Christ †). Paul speaks of the greatness of a mystery: the m. “of Christ and of the church.” And from that example he admonishes husbands to love their wives † œas also Christ loves the church † (Eph 5:28-33).
This was taken into account by some people who tried to place celibacy as a state superior to marriage. This idea was introduced in Christian circles from its earliest years. The apostles had to combat it. Paul warned that “in the last days” “deceivers” would come who would “forbid marriage” (1Ti 4:1-3). The writer of Hebrews exhorted: “Let marriage be honored in all, and the bed spotless” (Heb 13:4). †¢Celibacy.
Monogamy and polygamy. The will of God was that the m. was made between a single man with a single woman. When he wanted to find company for man, he did not create several women, but only one: Eve (“The Lord has testified between you and the woman of your youth, against whom you have been disloyal, she being your companion, and the wife of your covenant .Did he not make one, having an abundance of spirit in him?† ). Polygamy is a consequence of sin. The first to practice it was the violent †¢Lamech, who “took two wives for himself” (Gen 4:19-24). Since then, men have practiced polygamy. Among the Israelites this was quite common among the wealthy classes. But it was recognized that the ideal was monogamy. Thus, in different portions that speak of the m., it is tacit that it is about a single woman († œYour wife will be like a vine that bears fruit on the sides of your house †; † œThe virtuous woman is the crown of her husband † ; and so on). The Lord Jesus, speaking of the m., put the initial couple as the model of God: a man and a woman (“… at the beginning of creation, God made them male and female”). It is evident, from the words of the Lord Jesus, that certain alterations to the divine order, such as polygamy, were not punished by God for their patience. Thus, he gave instructions to put certain controls on that practice, through Moses. Those statutes that recognize the existence of polygamy were not given as to implant an ideal or a model (“Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this commandment”).
Inbreeding. The preference of the Hebrews to marry their children with women of their own nation comes from an ancient tradition. Abraham sent his servant to find a wife for Isaac († œ… you shall not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites †). Rebekah said to Isaac: “If Jacob takes a wife from the daughters of Heth, like these… what do I want life for?” (Gen 27:46). The main reason for this was that other peoples practiced idolatry and polytheism, with its sequel of moral corruption. That’s why the m were banned. with the inhabitants of Canaan (“You shall not interbreed with them … for it will lead your son away from following me, and they will serve other gods† ).
Actually, there was no general prohibition of marriages with foreigners. The only ones he was not allowed to marry were people from the seven nations that inhabited Canaan. A Hebrew could marry a prisoner taken in war with any country other than Canaan, to avoid contagion with their bad customs…