It’s time for a wedding ceremony that can make anyone’s heart race a little: the recitation or reading of the wedding vows. Within this brief segment of a wedding, a man and a woman promise to love each other in sickness and in sickness, through thick and thin, and will stay together until death do them part. No matter what the outcome of the marriage is from there, vows are the one time in the wedding ceremony where the couple not only speaks to each other (even if it’s to say “I do”), but conveys their desire. so that their marriage between them prospers and lasts.
In Christian marriages, the vows are very special since they are not vows made only to each other, but as a promise to God that this person will be treated with love and care, knowing that they are a gift from God. But are wedding vows found in the Bible? How did wedding vows become such a complex part of weddings over the years? And if you are a couple planning the upcoming nuptials, how should you choose wedding vows that not only reflect your feelings that day for your new spouse, but warm your heart every day for him/her in the days to come?
Traditional Protestant Marriage Vows
Statement of intents
____, You will have ____ to be your wife, to live together according to God’s order in the holy state of marriage? Will you love her as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her, will you comfort her, honor her, and care for her, and leave all others alone for her, as long as they both live on her? strong>____– I will do it
____, You will have ____ to be your husband, to live together according to God’s order in the holy state of marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, respect him, and submit to him as the church submits to Christ, and, abandoning all others, remain for him alone as long as you both live? ____– I will do it
exchange of votes
I ____, take you ____, to be my wife, to have and hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, in riches, in poverty, in sickness and in health, to love and cherish , until death do us part. This is my solemn vow.
I ____, take you ____, to be my husband, to have and hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and take care, until death do us part. This is my solemn vow.
Exchange of Rings
With this ring I marry you: with my body I honor you: and with all my earthly goods, I endow you. In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
There are other Protestant wedding vows that differ slightly in the Lutheran, Episcopalian, Presbyterian, and Baptist churches, etc. In addition, there are four options for catholic wedding vowsbut this is the standard:
Priest (or deacon): Since it is your intention to enter into the covenant of Holy Matrimony, join your right hands, and declare your consent before God and his Church.
Boyfriend: I, (name), take you, (name), to be my wife. I promise to be faithful to you in good times and bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.
Girlfriend: I, (name), take you, (name), to be my husband. I promise to be faithful to you in good times and bad, in sickness and in health, to love and honor you all the days of my life.
Origins of the Marriage Vow
Many, who may have attended one or two weddings, probably believe that wedding vows must have come from the Bible, given the idea that the bride and groom resemble the eternal bride and groom (the church and Jesus, respectively). ). However, there is no mention of wedding vows in the pages of the Bible, as stated in an article by Billy Hallowell of Pure Flix. But that doesn’t mean the Bible isn’t involved in some way in shaping wedding vows to express the love and joy a couple feels for each other on this special day.
The first recorded wedding vows, which you commonly hear at some weddings (I thee __ take you __), is from the common prayer book from Thomas Cranmer, Archbishop of Canterbury, which also originated in the Sarum Rite in England. during medieval times. The Book of Common Prayer it was written as a way of conducting church services when the Uniformity Act of 1549 prevented Latin masses from being celebrated in England. These wedding vows were part of the book.
Long before the time of Thomas Cranmer, marriage was not even considered something that a man and a woman did to show their love and union, but was usually done as a way of making peace or for commercial purposes between clans and clans. / or families. There were also, as many have seen in historical movies, marriages that were arranged by the parents of the bride and groom to cement kingdoms together or continue a certain bloodline or heritage. Although some arranged marriages still take place around the world, couples today are more likely to marry because they want to and not because of pressure from family, communities, or their culture.
View marriage as a covenant Relationship
Described as early as Genesis 6 of the Bible, when God began a covenant relationship with Noah, covenants were established between God and His people as a way to create an oath of kinship between God and man. In Genesis 6, God established this covenant with Noah because Noah stood out among his pagan community by honoring God in everything he did and said, and thus found favor with God. When people make a covenant with God, through Jesus, they are establishing a relationship of mutual love, respect and care, praying to God in quiet moments as well as in public, calling on his name for his help. In the same way, men and women enter into covenant relationships when they commit and marry, promising to join in love, respect, and care for each other while doing the same with God. Ephesians 5:30-32 even has the apostle Paul stating that just as we are members of God’s flesh and bones in covenant, a man becomes one with his wife in a marriage covenant.
Despite society’s acceptance of divorce as normal in today’s world, in God’s eyes, marriage is seen as leaving behind what was a single person to join and become one with your spouse, just as you left behind. back the carnal life in exchange for an eternal bond with God. It’s more about how a husband and wife come together in mutual understanding and sharing rather than just two people trying to start a covenant relationship while desperately clinging to their independence. We do the same thing sometimes in our relationships with God and this can sometimes lead us to not get to where we need to be in our destined paths due to our constant urge to do things our way.
A covenant is different from a contract, in that a contract can be broken at any time (such as in a divorce), but a covenant, with a spouse and with God, is something meant to last and grow as a person.
Types of wedding vows
The current use of wedding vows can be divided into two categories: traditional and personal (such as handwritten). Traditional generally defines the declaration of the vows mentioned above in the Book of Common Prayer, with the possibility of adding some of these recognized verses on marriage from the Bible to the vows, including 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, Genesis 2:24 and Ephesians 5:25.
Traditional can even be separated based on types of faith/culture, from Buddhist to Apache and Cherokee, to different denominations within Christianity: Lutheran, Jewish, Protestant, Baptist, Catholic, etc. Non-denominational vows are also mentioned, which focus more on the union between a man and a woman as a union between them and without reference to God or a higher power, and through the tying of a knot in a ceremony of unity.
Another popular option at weddings is for the bride and groom to write and recite their own vows, expressing what is on their hearts about their future spouses and what they hope the next few years of their lives will bring together. If you are writing your own vows, some suggestions for what to include might be to tell a story about the love you share with your future spouse, who your intention is for you, and to state what you promise to do or be in your marriage. funny or serious. For my wedding, our minister added our vows “through movies good and bad” as our wedding had a movie theme and we both loved movies (we still do).
However you choose to give your vows on your wedding day, the focus should not be on what style but on what is said and meant from the heart. Even the simple statements of “I do,” “till death do us part,” and “from this day forward” are not just general phrases you say to make sure your marriage is legally binding, but they are statements that show that this is not a marriage. contract with your spouse but the beginning of a lasting marriage covenant for now and beyond.