I am sure that at some time in your house you have had a leak, either due to rain or a damaged faucet that does not stop dripping. In fact, in my kitchen I have a small faucet that in the last week has not stopped dripping. When there is silence in the house (rarely to be honest) it is a sound that is constant, irritating and exasperating. It seems to drill you in the head. Sometimes you just want to rip it out and completely kill off that tormenting noise. It is something continuous, with rhythm, it does not stop, tick, tick, tick, drop by drop, and it continues to fall without ceasing, it is terrible! It despairs me, you know what I mean, right?
The dripping woman
Look what the Bible says in Proverbs 27:15-16:
“Constant drip on a rainy day And a contentious woman, they are similar; He who tries to contain it is like restraining the wind and collecting oil with his right hand.
The Bible compares this maddening noise of continuous dripping to the contentious woman. What does the word “rebellious” mean? It refers to a person who is always quarreling and giving rise to a state of hostility between two or more people. This is the characteristic of the woman described in these verses from the book of Proverbs.
What characterizes a contentious woman?
There are some characteristics that we can find in this type of woman:
– She is a woman who argues about anything with her husband, children, co-workers, or with anyone who is related to her.
– She is proud and only sees the bad that others do, and the good that she does. She thinks she’s almost perfect, and if it wasn’t for her everything would collapse.
– She is a woman who despairs of her husband and children, to the point that they prefer to be outside the house than to live with her. Proverbs says it this way: “It is better to live in a corner of the roof than in a house with a contentious wife” (21:9); “It is better to live in a deserted land than with a contentious and annoying woman” (21:19).
– She is an insistent woman, when she wants something she tries to get it at all costs, like Samson’s women who led him to ruin.
– For any reason create a battlefield. You cannot contradict him, it is difficult for him to admit that he has been wrong.
-He has no self-control, nor patience, he gets desperate and irritated right away. “He who tries to contain it is like restraining the wind and collecting oil with his right hand” (27:16).
It is terrible to be a contentious woman, a leaky woman. That others consider you like this is very sad and worrying. In the end, these types of women are totally alone: no one wants to be with them, not even their own family. It seems impossible to hold on. Most importantly, it is an attitude that dishonors the Lord.
Now, each one of us must analyze her life and see if we are having characteristics of this contentious woman. If we are truly believers, our lives should not be characterized in this way, since it is contrary to the spirit of a true Christian.
How we avoid being a continuous leaker
Before knowing Jesus Christ as our Savior and Lord, we were following the current of this world and the prince of this age, Satan. But when God came into our lives, he completely changed and transformed us. We are new creatures created in Christ Jesus for good works, and by the work of Christ we no longer have to live in slavery to sin. Through Christ we can live according to his Word. Through Christ we can avoid being that kind of woman.
Here are some tips to try not to be a contentious woman:
– First of all, if you see that your attitude is constantly being a contentious woman, ask God for forgiveness, and change direction. That is what repentance means, changing your mind and direction in your life. We can always find forgiveness in the arms of our God and Father.
– We have to put on the new man. “Therefore consider the members of your earthly body as dead… But now discard all these also: anger, anger, malice, insults, offensive language from your mouth,” Colossians 3:5,8.
– Let us ask the Holy Spirit to transform us and give us a gentle and peaceful spirit, which is of great esteem before God (1 Peter 3:4). Alone we cannot.
– To change our contentious character, we have to ask God for divine wisdom, and that begins with the fear of the Lord: “The beginning of wisdom is the fear of the Lord”Psalm 111:10. “The wise woman builds her house; but she the fool with her hands knocks her down ”Proverbs 14:1.
– Do not shout or raise your voice. We think that by shouting more we have more reason, but what it causes is more anger and discord: “A soft answer removes anger, but a harsh word makes fury rise”Proverbs 15:1.
– Ask yourself if something is worth arguing about. Sometimes the arguments and the quarrels come over unimportant things, but the quarrelsome woman makes a mountain of something very small and insignificant.
The opposite of a contentious woman who separates her husband from herself is a virtuous woman, and Proverbs 31 gives us the characteristics of that: “Her husband’s heart trusts in her…she gives him good and not bad all the days of her life. She opens her mouth wisely. Her children arise from her and call her blessed; and her husband also praises her. The woman who fears the LORD, she will be praised.”
One last word to those living at home with the dripping wife: Remember the gospel. Just as Christ forgave us, let us forgive one another.
Let us seek the Lord more so that he polishes us and transforms us from glory to glory. That with his help and mercy, we can reflect his love and character in our lives. May our goal as believing women be to have a gentle and quiet spirit, because it is not that God likes it, but that it is of great esteem before Him. May we live for his glory.